I am honored to be spotlighted in Mom 2.0’s “Four Seasons of Impact: Moms Making a Difference Year-Round” feature. The article celebrates the work of four women—Laurie Segall, Shannon Watts, Zoe Winkler Reinis, and myself—and highlights how mothers can be a powerful force for good year-round.
Having devoted much of my professional and personal life to promoting early literacy, I appreciate Mom 2.0’s recognition as a way to help spread the message about what it will take to build true literacy for all.
It was also an honor to be featured alongside these other changemakers, each making an impact— Laurie through tenacious journalism, Shannon through relentless advocacy for gun safety, and Zoe through heart-driven humanitarian work. To stand in community with other women working for a better tomorrow is deeply meaningful.
I was featured as the “Summer” voice in this seasonal spotlight, a time for “growth and exploration,” in the article’s words—which feels fitting for the work I do. In my book, Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child, I advocate for early, intentional support of children’s reading development. I believe deeply that literacy is among the greatest gifts we can give all our children. It’s also one of the most powerful ways we can equip the next generation to succeed, thrive, and lead.
Reading isn’t just about decoding letters on a page. It’s about opening doors—socially, emotionally, and academically. With nationwide challenges evident in reading scores, my work feels more urgent than ever. Through my book, speeches, workshops, and blog, I’m committed to giving parents the tools and encouragement they need to support their kids, starting well before kindergarten.
I’m grateful to Mom 2.0 for elevating this mission and for continuously shining a light on the impact of mothers as leaders, educators, and changemakers. Motherhood has many faces, and this feature is a beautiful reminder that no matter your passion or profession, you can channel it into something that benefits your community—and the world.
Check out the full feature here:
Here’s to all the moms and caregivers making a difference in every season—and to the many more ready to step into their own impact.
Get Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child
Learn how to foster your child’s pre-reading and reading skills easily, affordably, and playfully in the time you’re already spending together.
Get Reading for Our Lives
I’m thrilled to share my latest piece, published by Katie Couric Media: “How Grandparents Are Shaping the Next Generation of Readers.” It’s a piece close to my heart that highlights something we don’t talk about enough—how grandparents are quietly, powerfully shaping children’s learning and literacy today.
In the article, I explore the unique and growing role grandparents play in modern families, including mine. Whether they’re helping with school pickups, cooking meals, or sharing beloved books from their own childhoods, grandparents are increasingly part of kids’ daily lives—and that gives them a meaningful opportunity to support early language and literacy.
Drawing from my family’s experience and national trends, I got to share how even the simplest moments of grandparenting young kids can have a lasting impact on their development. And grandparents often bring something no one else can: time, wisdom, and a slower pace that invites conversation, storytelling, and learning.
This article is a celebration of the vital role grandparents play in nurturing future readers—and a practical call to action for anyone with a grandparent or grandchild in their life.
Whether you’re a grandparent helping raise young kids yourself, you’re a parent relying on grandparenting support, or you know families that are, I hope you’ll find this article interesting and relevant. And please consider sharing it with a grandparent who’s making a difference—sometimes the quietest support leaves the deepest impact.
Get Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child
Learn how to foster your child’s pre-reading and reading skills easily, affordably, and playfully in the time you’re already spending together.
Get Reading for Our Lives Father’s Day is a chance to show all the dads they’re appreciated—and an opportunity to encourage small kids to show gratitude and love.
Young children often don’t have the words or perspective to articulate just how much their parents mean to them, but with a little creativity and guidance, even toddlers can take part in meaningful gestures that speak louder than words.
Here’s how to walk small kids through a special Father’s Day and gently build their emotional intelligence along the way.
1. It Starts with Conversation
Even very young children can reflect on what they love about their dad. Ask open-ended questions like:
- “What’s your favorite thing to do with Daddy?”
- “What makes Papa funny or silly?”
- “Why do you love your dad?”
Really listen to their answers and treat them with respect, even if they say something hilarious. Write down their answers and consider using them in a homemade card or artwork. Their sweet, unfiltered words are often the most touching gift a parent can receive.
That said, be ready to maintain your good humor if your child’s replies are unexpected or they don’t feel like cooperating with the activity. Responding and adapting to your little one with patience and flexibility is key to helping them build emotional smarts.
2. Create Something Together
Handmade gifts are like time capsules of a child’s growing heart and hands. Here are a few age-appropriate ideas:
- Handprint or footprint art: Turn their prints into a heart, a tree, or even a little superhero with “Dad” written underneath.
- “Why I Love Dad” booklet: Let your child dictate their thoughts while you write or draw them together.
- Photo collage: Print photos of special moments between father and child, and let your little one help glue and decorate the collage.
- Father’s Day poem: Follow this simple Father’s Day acrostic poem tutorial to make an adorable keepsake card.
- Bonus Gift: books to read together. If you want to buy a present for dad, picture books to read with their little ones can be a great option that encourages father-child bonding. Check out this list of great picture books for Father’s Day.
3. Encourage Acts of Kindness
Father’s Day isn’t about grand gifts. It’s about making Dad feel seen and valued.
A picnic in the park, a backyard “Dad’s Day Olympics,” or reading favorite books together can be more memorable than anything from a store.
Demonstrate to your child that, in relationships, small gestures can go a long way. Teach children that appreciation doesn’t always come in the form of a present. Instead, guide them toward kind actions like:
- Giving Dad a hug and wishing him a happy Father’s Day.
- Making a special breakfast—with help, of course.
- Bringing Dad his slippers or favorite snack.
- Helping tidy up the living room “as a surprise.”
Let children know that their time, smiles, and hugs are often the best gift a parent can receive. These actions show love in a way children can feel proud of.
4. Model Appreciation for Kids
Children learn by watching. When they see you appreciating their dad—whether it’s your partner, co-parent, or another father figure—they absorb that kindness. A simple, “We’re so lucky to have Daddy, aren’t we?” helps kids link gratitude to relationship-building.
Helping small children show appreciation for their dads isn’t about crafting the perfect gift or curating the perfect experience. It’s about nurturing empathy and connection.
Father’s Day can become a cherished memory not just for Dad, but for the child who got to say “I love you” in their own special way.
I’m so excited to share my latest article in CNBC, “Kids who learn this 1 skill early on are highly successful in life.” It’s such a meaningful opportunity to reach a new audience and get evidence-based advice into the hands of as many parents and caregivers as possible.
In the piece, I dive into research-backed early literacy strategies that families can use right from the first stages of a child’s development. I highlight how simple, everyday interactions—like narrating your actions, having back-and-forth conversations, and weaving books naturally into daily routines—can make a powerful difference in a child’s reading journey.
For anyone committed to fostering early literacy and helping close achievement gaps, I hope this article serves as a practical, encouraging resource. I truly believe that small, intentional moments can lay the strongest foundation for a child’s future reading success.
Take a look and please share the article with anyone in your life who might benefit from the information.
The book distills key insights from my book, Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child.
The key takeaway I shared in the article is that raising a strong reader isn’t just about cozy bedtime stories—it’s about weaving language and literacy into everyday life. Drawing on more than a decade of research and expert interviews, I explain that small, consistent interactions throughout the day lay the groundwork for reading success.
Early pre-reading and reading abilities predict long-term academic and career outcomes, so it’s crucial that parents and early caregivers nurture these skills from the start. Luckily, they can do this through simple, powerful early literacy strategies like responding to baby babble, asking questions and waiting for answers, and bringing kids’ attention to the letters of the alphabet and their sounds in daily life.
Successful parents also engage kids in playful language activities, such as rhymes and tongue twisters, which sharpen children’s ability to hear and manipulate sounds—a critical skill for reading. Importantly, they don’t reserve reading for bedtime; they seize opportunities to share books and printed words throughout the day, from mealtime to errands.
By making reading and conversation a natural, regular part of family life, parents help children build the strong language foundation necessary for literacy and long-term success.
Get Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child
Learn how to foster your child’s pre-reading and reading skills easily, affordably, and playfully in the time you’re already spending together.
Get Reading for Our Lives When we think of kids and reading, we often think about boosting literacy, fostering academic success, or helping them wind down before bed. But stories offer so much more, too—connection, escape, and, importantly, the opportunity to expand kids’ minds and perspectives.
Books can be a powerful way to help your child grow into a kind, compassionate person and to develop their social and emotional intelligence, which in turn supports strong social skills and mental health. Reading opens a world of experiences beyond their own, and with just a few thoughtful tweaks to your routine, you can use books to nurture empathy and social-emotional awareness. Here’s how:
1. Read Fiction
Fiction is a natural empathy-builder. When kids follow a character’s journey—especially through struggles, mistakes, and growth—they begin to understand what it feels like to walk in someone else’s shoes. They can also absorb valuable examples of resilience.
Whether they’re about a dragon learning to control its temper or a little girl nervous on the first day of school, fictional stories help children relate to others’ emotions. This connection lays the groundwork for caring about others in real life.
There’s research that backs up this intuitive link between relating to fictional characters’ feelings and developing empathy, social smarts, and emotional intelligence. Contributing writer Andrea Hunt curated a list of touching picture books to help build empathy to get you started.
As kids get older, they’ll naturally want to pick their own reading material, and it’s wise to let them. You can still influence their choices, however—sometimes recommending a favorite title will do it. Other times, simply leaving out a stack of tempting and well chosen books will pique an older reader’s interest.
- Tip: Choose evocative stories that make readers care about the characters and relate to their feelings. If a story makes you tear up as you read, it may be a good pick!
2. Read Stories About Characters Who Are Different
It’s tremendously meaningful for kids to see people like them represented in books, so provide your child with chances to see themselves reflected in fiction. At the same time, stories also offer a valuable opportunity to help kids empathize with people who are different than they are. It’s well worth your while to make a conscious effort to select books with characters from different cultures, backgrounds, abilities, interests, and experiences, too.
These stories broaden your child’s perspective and normalize diversity. Whether they’re about a refugee family, a child in a different part of the country or world, or a sympathetic character with a different background or personality than your child, these narratives help kids see the world through someone else’s eyes—and feel for them.
You can stretch your child by including excellent stories about people or experiences they might know less about or relate to less. Kids often gravitate to finding a sense of identity based on exclusion, from boys vs girls in preschool to jocks vs drama kids in middle school. Widely diverse fiction can gently push them and build tolerance that they’ll apply in real life.
- Tip: It helps build empathy when kids can relate to a character in some way, even if the character is outwardly very different from them. Look for emotionally complex, sympathetic stories that create nuanced characters that kids can really get invested in.
3. Talk About What You Read
When you read aloud to your child, take a little time to chat. If your little one interrupts the story to talk about it or to share their own experiences, that’s gold—embrace it. You can also spark reflection with gentle questions about how your child would feel in the character’s situation, and get the conversation going by sharing your own (genuine) reactions or experiences.
As your child gets older and reads independently, look for opportunities to connect around books—without stepping on their toes too much. If they read a book you’ve read, try chatting with them about it. If they recommend a book to you, make it your business to find time to read it. You can also ask if they have any recommendations of books you should check out.
Consider questions and prompts like:
- “This story makes me remember a time I felt so embarrassed/sad/shy…”
- “Wow, I feel so sad for this character—it never occurred to me that someone might feel that way.”
- “Have you ever had something like that happen to you?”
- “Have you ever felt that way?”
- “How do you think that made her feel?”
- “What would you do if you were in his shoes?”
- “Why do you think they acted that way?” “I think…”
Open-ended questions help your child reflect on emotions and motivations. You don’t need to quiz them—just be curious together. Let the conversation flow naturally. Over time, this kind of reflection will become a habit, helping kids become more thoughtful and aware of others. It can also help them learn to assume good intentions and handle conflicts more patiently.
This will not only turn them into a kinder person, but it will also make them better at social interactions, smoothing their path a bit as they grow up.
- Tip: Provide a reading journal and encourage your child to chronicle their reactions to books. Reflecting on their reading and exploring their thoughts about it in writing, as well as conversation, can also support emotional intelligence and self-expression.
4. Be Kind and Responsive
Empathy is caught, not just taught. The way you respond to your child as you talk about books (or other things!) matters, too. Listen without interrupting. Acknowledge your child’s thoughts and feelings. If your child resists, don’t push too hard. Children—like all humans—can be sensitive. It is painful to relate to difficult feelings, even in fiction.
Sometimes, the difficult emotions or situations facing a fictional character may feel too painful for your child to handle. In these cases, they may act like they don’t care or even say something cruel about the person suffering the difficulty. Don’t assume this means your child doesn’t care about others. It may actually be a sign that they need to put some space between themselves and the character, because the feelings are too real.
Overall, show your child the empathy and compassion you’d like them to develop. As you model warmth, patience, and curiosity, your child will learn how to offer those same qualities to others.
- Tip: Cultivate responsiveness in your interactions with your child. Responsive parenting is actually associated with raising smart, emotionally intelligent kids and will build your bond as your child grows.
The Takeaway
You don’t need fancy tools or complex lessons to teach empathy and social-emotional intelligence. A simple story, a quiet moment, and a little conversation can go a long way.
Remember, raising children is a long-term marathon, not a sprint. You don’t have to do it all, all the time. A bit of intentionality and some moments of meaningful connection can be pivotal.
So next time you settle in for a bedtime book, remember: you’re not just reading a story—you’re growing a heart.
Raising kids these days seems to involve, among other things, mountains of stuff. And as we navigate family life and all those attendant belongings, it can be hard to find a balance.
Do we hold onto mementos that pile up at warp speed? (That adorable first outfit, a favorite lovey, beautiful book gifts, and so on…) Or do we declutter in real time, with the risk of finding that some metaphorical babies have gone out with the bathwater?
I’ve been thinking about this while clearing out my family’s beloved collection of picture books. We really, really like reading and have owned a lot of picture books. As in, a lot. With my youngest poised to enter middle school, it’s clearly time to purge all but a few very special ones.
Yet it’s been hard to let them go. There was so much of the toddlers and preschoolers my adolescents once were—and the young mother I was to them—wrapped up in those volumes. We certainly couldn’t keep them, but I hated to discard them without a trace. Filling boxes to donate, I imagined my kids someday recalling hazy memories of favorite stories but unable to find the titles.
And this, in turn, got me thinking about the great value of keeping a family reading journal. After all, when we record what we’ve read, we can capture the substance of our reading without storing physical books. We can consult the list years later to rediscover old reads, and even reacquire any we wish to read again from a library or bookstore.
There are many other benefits to keeping a family book journal, of course—encouraging conversation and connection, writing and deep thinking, and lifelong habits of reading and reflection. But my nostalgic side warms to the idea of pinning down those precious moments when my kids adored hearing stories that now barely rate as memories in their busy teen and tween worlds. Of storing those memories safely, ready to pull out and dust off down the line.
So that tops my list of reasons to keep a family reading journal with your children, although the others are at least as valuable.
4 Reasons to Keep a Family Reading Journal
Below are my top four reasons to start a book journal with your kids. But before we go through them, I just want to note that there are many ways to journal, so find what’s right for you.
Writing on paper—not your phone—is ideal with small children, but that can be as simple or creative as you like. Create a lovely paper journal if that’s your jam. Or just jot down notes together and then snap photos to preserve them in a digital album.
Ultimately, your journal—much like the books you share—is about the information and ideas it contains, not the vessel that holds them.
Whatever form you choose, write down the titles and authors of the books you read, the date you read (or finish) them, and you and your child’s reactions or thoughts. You might even include a couple of notes about their favorite character or a great quote.
1. Cherish the Memories Without the Clutter
As your child grows, you’ll move through hundreds of books. A family reading journal offers a beautiful balance between drowning under books (believe me, it’s a real possibility) and treating them like paper plates, swiftly discarded and even more swiftly forgotten.
Collect the memories of the stories you’ve shared without needing to keep the books themselves forever. Later, even without a house full of dusty shelves, you and your child can look back at the literary worlds you visited together—and even share them with the next generation.
2. Foster Special Moments and Deepen Reflection
Sharing a book with your child is already a special time, and adding a journal entry afterward can elevate it into a mini-ritual. Writing down both of your reactions, your child’s favorite elements, and thoughts about the story encourages reflection and conversation that builds your child’s brain and your connection.
It opens up the door to delving deeper and gives your child space to reflect and feel heard. What made them laugh? What made them think? How did you feel reading it together? You’re not just recording facts; you’re capturing emotions and insights that help develop empathy, curiosity, and critical thinking.
Just be sure not to force it or push too much. You don’t want the practice to backfire and make your or your child feel like story time is too much work or requires too much vulnerability. Make sure you allow both of you to sometimes just share a story on the fly, without a need to pull out your journal. Just journaling occasionally or about favorite stories is fine.
3. Encourage Writing and Self-Expression
Keeping a family reading journal can also be a lovely, fun way to encourage your child to work on their writing. You’ll want to take on the journal-writing duties at first, recording the details of books you share. As your child grows, give them opportunities to write the titles or author names.
Eventually they can take on writing up their reactions or thoughts on the books. This will encourage your child to develop their writing skills and self-expression. With a bit of luck, it may even fuel a habit of reflection and journaling that can support mental health, self-awareness, and deep thinking as they grow into young adults.
4. Create a Keepsake for the Future
One day, this journal can be a precious window into your child’s early years. Beyond the photos and report cards, a family reading journal can give a rare glimpse into their developing mind and heart. It will be a keepsake filled with the books that shaped their childhood, their budding opinions, their sense of humor, and your shared experience as a family.
Imagine your grown child flipping through your old reading journal, rediscovering the books you loved together. They may one day share these very same titles with their own children, reading aloud the stories that once filled your living room with laughter and wonder. The journal can become more than a personal memory—it can be a legacy, a bridge between generations built on shared stories and family traditions.
A huge part of my mission as an author and literacy advocate is connecting directly with readers—hearing your stories, learning about your challenges, and sharing practical strategies to help families raise strong, confident readers.
That’s why I’m so excited about my national virtual book club tour in celebration of the newly revised paperback edition of my book, Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child.
This tour is about making the book’s messages—and me—accessible to communities everywhere. I know not every school, district, library, or nonprofit has the budget to bring me in as a keynote speaker or host a large in-person event. A virtual book club makes it possible to gather your people, dive into the ideas together, and still have me right there in the room with you—live, interactive, and affordable.
Why Host a Virtual Book Club?
When you host a session, you’re giving your constituency—families, staff, or volunteers—tools they can use immediately. You’re helping them access simple, evidence-based strategies for preparing kids to thrive as readers. You’re also amplifying your organization’s impact by positioning your literacy work as essential for school readiness, educational equity, and family well-being.
Here’s how it works:
- We start with a quick planning call to discuss your goals and customize your experience.
- You receive 25 paperback copies of Reading for Our Lives, plus a plug-and-play host kit with run-of-show, discussion guide, and promo assets.
- We come together for a 60-minute live virtual Q&A—not a lecture—where I answer candid questions and tailor my advice to your community’s context.
Parents and staff get the book ahead of time, so they can arrive informed and armed with questions to help them adapt it to their specific needs. This helps them leave empowered with concrete next steps. The outcomes we aim for are lasting: stronger confidence, usable literacy routines, and momentum that extends well beyond one event.
What Hosts Are Saying
After hosting a virtual book club, Claire Hagan Alvarado of Literacy First said, “The feedback was great. People really enjoyed the conversation. It felt really personable and … really challenged our group to extend our impact.”
And Jill Gonzalez of the Women’s Storybook Project of Texas shared, “The book club experience was fantastic. Having the author with us made such a difference. It is different when you get to speak to the person who wrote the words, when you get to have the perspective of the expert.”
An Invitation
I wrote Reading for Our Lives because I believe every child deserves a strong start with words, stories, letters, and language. And while the literacy crisis and achievement gaps can feel daunting, the solutions start close to home—with parents, caregivers, and communities taking small, daily actions that add up to big change.
If you’re ready to elevate your impact and help equip caregivers to help kids thrive as readers, I’d love to explore joining your group for a virtual book club. Together, we can turn insights into action and build the momentum every child deserves.
The Reading for Our Lives Campaign launched in Milwaukee last month—not with a lecture about my book, but with an invitation for reflection and action.
Guests at the campaign launch explored the roots of our community’s literacy challenges, potential solutions, and their own roles in creating change.
My favorite prompt posed a powerful question to the group:
If you had $1 million to help more Milwaukee children learn to read, where would you invest it?
Participants had to choose just one option:
- High-quality teacher training
- Literacy coaches in every district
- Parent coaching or home-visiting programs
- One-on-one tutoring
- Literacy training for all family-facing professionals
- Free books for every child, every year
Each option had merit, but each reflected a different theory of change—who benefits, how to deliver support, and when results appear.
If I were choosing, I’d be tempted to fund a team of exceptional tutors. Strong one-on-one instruction can improve reading prospects dramatically. But tutoring is a rescue mission—helping children already behind, not preventing reading failure in the first place.
At the event, the clear favorite was parent coaching and home-visiting programs—a recognition that reading success begins long before kindergarten. Teacher training and professional literacy development followed.
I loved seeing that focus on prevention—on reaching parents of babies and toddlers who can shape the brain architecture and language foundation that reading depends on. When we act early, we reduce the need for costly remediation later and free up resources for the few who still need intensive support.
That’s the heart of this campaign: to shift attention and resources to seeding literacy success from birth. Every dollar invested early multiplies in impact, strengthening families, schools, and our nation’s future.
As Dan Heath writes in Upstream, “We celebrate the response, the recovery, the rescue. But we’re capable of greater things: less Undo and more Outdo.”Join us in investing early—for lasting change. Your gift helps more families lay the foundation for lifelong reading success.
Children encounter thousands of unique words in elementary school reading programs each year. But here’s the catch: unless they can recognize most words instantly—without sounding them out—they’ll exhaust their mental energy on matching sounds to letters and have little left for actually understanding what they read.
So how do kids develop rapid word recognition skills and become more fluent readers—and how can parents help?
How Children Actually Learn Words
Contrary to popular belief, children don’t learn words by visually memorizing them. Instead, they build word knowledge through varied experiences with different features of words: spelling, pronunciation, and meaning. Research suggests it takes one to six meaningful encounters with a word for children to truly master it.
Notice I say “experiences,” not just “exposures.” Simply seeing a word in passing isn’t enough. Children need to actively pay attention to the word, notice the letters within it, think about the sounds that make it up, and understand what it means.
The TALK Method for Everyday Vocabulary Building
Parents can easily build their child’s word knowledge in everyday life using the TALK method.
This is a framework I crafted to help parents incorporate more brain-building interactions into days with small kids and increase the quality of interactions. (You can learn more about it and get other science-based tips in my book, Reading for Our Lives.)
The TALK Method encourages parents—and all early caregivers—to use four simple tools to create rich language- and brain-building interactions with kids:
- Taking turns
- Asking questions
- Labeling and pointing
- Keeping the conversation going
The key to using the TALK Method as a reading fluency strategy is listening to children to discover which words spark their interest, then seizing those natural teaching moments. When kids show curiosity about a word, half the battle—capturing their attention—is already won.
Taking Turns: A Real Example
I’ll give you an example. I dropped into a chair in my daughter’s room the other day, sighed heavily, and declared that I was weary.
“What’s that mean?” she asked.
“Extremely tired,” I replied.
She nodded, then said she thought it meant something else. She put on a frightened face, darting her eyes side to side like she was watching for the boogeyman. (She has a flair for the dramatic.)
“Ohhh,” I laughed, “that’s wary—when you’re on guard, scanning for danger. I said weary. W-E-A-R-Y. It’s like wary but with an ‘e’ before the ‘a.’”
In that brief exchange, we hit all three essential elements of word learning:
- Sound: We both pronounced the word, and I clarified the vowel sound difference.
- Spelling: I spelled out W-E-A-R-Y, emphasizing the letter difference between “weary” and “wary.”
- Meaning: We explored both her misunderstanding and my clarification.
Asking Questions to Deepen Learning
To strengthen word knowledge further, ask questions about meaning:
- “What are some words similar to this one?”
- “What are some words that are opposite to this one?”
You can also prompt sound analysis:
- “How many sounds do you hear in the word weary?”
- “Can you break out each sound?”
- “Can you blend them back together?”
Labeling and Pointing: Don’t Forget the Visual
While verbal discussion is crucial, also tie words to what children see in print. Look at the word while asking children to segment it or compare it to similar words. Point to words in meaningful contexts—in stories, on shopping lists, signs, billboards, or everyday items in your environment.
And don’t forget that you can create the text you want to talk about as well. The weary discussion might have made a greater impression if I’d written the word down so she could see it while saying it. But I’m sure she saw it in her mind’s eye.
Keeping the Conversation Going
Expand, extend, and ask for clarification. Do whatever helps the word stick in your child’s memory.
Tell a story about the word. (Did you misuse it when you were younger? Do you remember how you learned the word?) Recount its history. Share tidbits about word origins. (Is it a word that’s close to French and came into the language after the Norman conquest of England? A word that’s been adapted from technology or business uses?)
Subscribing to word-of-the-day emails or apps is a great way to pick up some fun knowledge to share.
Match Your Approach to Your Child’s Reading Phase
Your child’s reading development phase determines which activities will be most effective:
For kids who don’t know or are just learning the ABCs (called pre-alphabetic and partial alphabetic readers):
- Build vocabulary: Use rich, varied words in conversation and explain their meanings.
- Play with sounds: Try rhyming games, clapping out syllables, and identifying beginning sounds in words.
- Teach letters systematically: Practice one letter at a time—for example, tell your child, “A says /a/ like in apple” and trace the letter shape with your finger.
For children who know letter names, shapes, and common sounds (called alphabetic readers):
- Introduce new words: Continue expanding vocabulary through conversation and reading together.
- Practice sound segmentation: Help your child break words into individual sounds. (For example, ask, “What sounds do you hear in cat?” Learn more in my post about sound awareness.)
- Connect sounds to letters: Show how the sounds they hear match the letters they see.
- Read words in context: Point out target words when reading stories, signs, or everyday text together.
Growing with Your Child
These vocabulary conversations evolve as children mature. My eighth-grader and I still actively discuss words—our chats have just become more sophisticated as her vocabulary grows.
During one car ride, she puzzled over two uses of “blunt” in her novel—one describing a person, the other a dull object. She was fascinated that a single word could carry such different meanings.
Another time, driving through our always-under-construction neighborhood, I complained that “No Thru Traffic” signs were used too liberally.
“What does that mean?” she asked, referring to my new-to-her use of liberally.
“Too much,” I replied.
“Why does it mean that?” she followed up, thinking about the ways the words liberal and conservative are used in political contexts.
“Oh,” she went on, answering her own question, “like the opposite of conservatively. If they used the signs conservatively, they would be conserving them, not using so many.”
Exactly!
Why These Quick Conversations Matter
Research confirms that fluent readers must connect three elements about words: sound, spelling, and meaning. Rather than memorizing words by sight alone, children build deeper word knowledge when they pronounce words, understand their letter sequences, and explore their meanings in context.
When children first learn to read, they painstakingly sound out every letter. But with experience, familiar words become instantly recognizable. That automatic recognition frees mental energy for comprehension—the very purpose of reading.
This automaticity is crucial. When children don’t waste mental energy sounding out individual words (“decoding”), they can focus their brainpower on understanding whole passages.
Studies confirm that good readers in elementary school acquire new words at a rate up to four times faster than struggling readers. Your vocabulary conversations aren’t just helping your child learn individual words. They’re also building the foundation for accelerated vocabulary growth throughout their academic years.
Research shows that skilled readers don’t just know more words—they recognize them faster. High-ability readers process words in about 746 milliseconds compared to 871 milliseconds for lower-ability readers. That split-second difference adds up, giving skilled readers an edge in comprehension and confidence.
Parents’ goal should be to help our kids’ vocabulary grow until they can instantly recognize nearly anything we put in front of them. See every opportunity to talk with kids about words as a chance to build the automatic word recognition that makes reading effortless and enjoyable.
Without this foundation, children tire themselves out decoding and lose energy for understanding—the ultimate prize.
At a recent “Science Café” at the YWCA Southeast Wisconsin’s OECI Office in Milwaukee, I skipped the stats and studies. These gatherings aim to spark dialogue on science or medicine, but I opened my discussion of the science of reading with stories—my own path to reading, and an invitation for parents to reflect on theirs.
Why? Because what truly motivates parents to act on behalf of their children isn’t data—it’s feelings. The strong desire to nurture a bright reading future for our kids often stems from our own reading experiences, whether joyful or painful.
All Reading Memories Matter
Many writers get nostalgic about their love of books—cherished stories, favorite authors, endless hours in libraries. I’m no exception. In my book, Reading for Our Lives, I share how reading shaped me so deeply that, like my parents before me, I named my daughter after an author.
But not every reading memory is so fond. Many parents recall the sting of stumbling through a passage in class, the ache of leaving book fairs empty-handed, or the frustration of staring at words that just wouldn’t make sense.
But the good news is: Whatever your story, it can fuel your child’s in a good direction.
Take a moment to remember: Was reading easy for you? Hard? What emotions surface—joy, shame, pride, isolation, excitement? Then ask yourself: What feelings do I want my child to carry into their future? Twenty years from now, how do I hope they’ll describe their journey?
With those answers in mind, you can begin shaping experiences that move them in that direction—choosing the books, planning the library visits, weaving conversation into daily life. You don’t control every step of their journey, but you have more influence than you may realize. Small, intentional choices add up to lasting impact.
If reading was hard for you, that struggle can spark vigilance—watching closely for difficulties, seeking resources early, and ensuring your child gets help you may not have had. This matters, especially since challenges like dyslexia can run in families.
And if you loved reading, you can pass on that joy—recreating the warmth of shared stories and library visits—while remembering your child’s journey will look different, shaped by new times, new tools, and their own personality.
The Gift of Struggle
Every reader—child or adult—faces challenges along the way. What matters is how we frame those moments.
Struggle, effort, and frustration are not detours in your child’s literacy journey. They’re the very path to growth. And when those moments come, your own reading story becomes a powerful tool for connection and encouragement.
Pam Allyn, a longtime educator and literacy advocate, put it this way in a podcast: “I make time every day to struggle as a reader, and that’s because I’m a confident reader.” Her insight reveals that reading confidence isn’t the absence of struggle, but the willingness to face it.
That’s why your reading history matters. When your child stumbles through a passage or grows frustrated with a new book, share more than your love of reading or your hopes for your child. Share your own confusion, your persistence, and your eventual breakthroughs. By revealing both your reading struggles and your growth, you model resilience. You show that difficulty isn’t shameful—it’s simply part of every reader’s journey.
And when you acknowledge and honor your child’s feelings—frustration, fear, excitement—you validate their experience and give them courage to continue. In doing so, you help them see effort not as a barrier, but as a bridge to strength.
What Research Tells Us
Studies confirm what experience suggests: parents’ literacy histories shape how they support their children. For some, early reading struggles spark determination. For others, those struggles erode confidence, leaving them unsure of how to help.
How parents feel about reading also matters. If you see it as entertainment, you may focus on joy and fun. If you view it as a skill, you may emphasize practice and progress. If you see it as an opportunity, you may seek out schools, libraries, and enrichment programs. Each approach is shaped by personal history and perspective.
The key is awareness. Reflect on your own story:
- Your early childcare or preschool experiences
- Your formal education from kindergarten onward
- Your family’s literacy traditions
- Any mismatch between your school’s approach to literacy and your home environment
All of these threads weave together into your current outlook and, consciously or not, influence how you guide your child.
I know this firsthand. My own love of literature, being named after an author, and later naming my daughter after one all contributed to the intensity I brought to raising her as a reader. My history shaped my priorities.
The question, then, is not whether your literacy story influences you—it does. The question is: Will you let it guide you unconsciously, or will you use it intentionally? The more aware you are, the more you can choose to replicate positive experiences, rewrite negative ones, and create a reading journey for your child that builds both skill and joy.
Your reading story, with all its triumphs and struggles, is a gift ready to be unpacked and shared.
Get Reading for Our Lives: The Urgency of Early Literacy and the Action Plan to Help Your Child
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